Google search referrer of the month has got to be "kinky octopi". I hope that the person typing that in was hoping for some kind of googlewhack, because any alternate explanation is too much to fathom.
What would constitute a kinky octopus in any case? Is it possible for an animal to be kinky? Are they certain octopuses who like to dress up as other sea creatures or have an amputatee fetish and only like having sex with other octopuses with seven legs and a stump? Surely it is not possible for an octopus to be kinky because to be so it would have to make a moral decision about sex which I don't believe it is capable of. Is the sea full of octopuses who know that it's wrong to have sex with humans, but really want to do so and whenever they see a man swimming around amongst them, flutter their octopus eyelashes and flirt with him? Would these kinky octopuses be intelligent enough to have set up a website to advertise their own kinkiness?
What worries me about the man searching for these perverted sea-creatures if that one octopus is clearly not enough for him. He wants "octopi", perhaps having realised that with those eight tentacles an octopus can satisfy multiple partners, of both its own and other species. The google searcher wants at least two octopuses and I am guessing probably eight of them, in a circle, with him in the middle, with ever orifice he has stuffed with a tentacle or two. I think he's hoping that the kinky octopuses will be happy to perform for him, lezzing up, maybe or possibly fellating a seahorse. That's what I imagine he's after. I personally think he's sick for even being able to imagine that scenario, but it is not ours to judge the kinky octopus loving man.
You'd think that if he liked octopuses so much he would at least know how to pluralise their name correctly, and if you've chanced across this page, mate (as I am sure you have, you pervert) then try typing "Kinky octopuses" into Google and you'll find thousands of websites dedicated to your fetish, though you can tell from some of the octopus acting that many of the octopuses are just going through the motions for the money or fish or whatever it is that octopuses eat (you probably want to find that out too: if you have food for them then real octopuses will be much keener to anally violate an oyster for your viewing pleasure and you won't have to rely on the internet any more).
What I don't understand is why the "kinky octopi" man got directed to my site as (previously) I had no mentions of them on these pages and a brief look through the pages it throws up that do mention kinky octopi, shows no link to this site. Unless Google is so sophisticated that it is now able to guess what information sites will contain in the future - "Ah, Kinky octopi, I assess that Richard Herring is not only sick enough to write about that, but that he is too stupid to know the correct plural of octopus. Send the fella there and let him wait."
Well Google, you were clever enough to know I would cover this subject, but you underestimated my intelligence. I know it's octopuses not octopi and I also know that you get some much better sites if you put "Whorish slut cum-faced Octopuses" into your search engine.
