Weight 13st 8. CNPS numbers spotted 15 (698).
My best CNPS day ever. All the hard work and dedication is paying off and I was able to pick up around ten numbers this morning by using my extensive note pads and my slightly damaged car. Sunday morning is a great time to do CNPS as everyone is still in bed and their cars are outside their homes. Suddenly the task of spotting 300 numbers in a little over 70 days doesn't seem impossible.
But this is not a time for complacency.
I had been getting on well with 21 after a day lying in the sun drinking champagne in Kew Gardens (this is another winner, fellas. I have learnt much, but I can not pass it all on, because it would give the inter-nerd men too much power). But I will give you a few scraps of information. Women like champagne and the sun. If you can give them both in enough quantities then you shall have them in your thrall regardless of what you look like or how dull you are.
But all my good work was for naught as we then got on to the subject of CNPS and I explained to her what I was doing. A look of visible panic crossed 21's pretty face. Had she heard right? Had I driven around west london on a beautiful morning like this morning, looking at number plates that I had taken down in the course of the last few weeks, whilst wandering around the same areas?
A million of gallons of champagne served up by a waiter made of diamonds, sitting on a chair made of flowers, on the surface of the sun itself would not be enough to make a woman be attracted in this situation. "Don't prejudge me, " I protested, "CNPS is a great game."
"What did you call it?" she asked, "CNPS?"
"It stands for 'consecutive number plate spotting'" I replied proudly. Perhaps the cool abrreviation would suck her into my world.
"You've abbreviated it" she said with a pity in her eyes that I havdn't seen since I actually had a girlfriend.
Perhaps even more sadly I would rather get to see 15 CNPS numbers in a single day than win the heart (or even the singing skull) of a beautiful young maiden.
After the champagne and the sun, I am pretty sure that 21 could have become the first Mrs Herring (and maybe also the fourth one as well - that's how good she was), but after the CNPS conversation I could see I had blown it. If you play CNPS it is best not to mention this to a prospective partner until the wedding ceremony is over and they can't get away (due to a loop-hole in the law CNPS is not as yet grounds for divorce).
As we left the gardens I spotted a 698. "I know where there are three 699s nearly all together, plus a 700 just up the street. Do you want to come and see them?" I asked.
"No," said 21, "I think I'd better go to Norfolk."
It is a bitter rejection when a woman is prepared to go to such lengths to get away from you. Especially as she lived in Notting Hill.
