I have found
this website about St Skeletor's Day. One day wikipedia will be forced to recognise it. Keep the dream alive.
Having my hair cut seems to make me philosophical. Alas it only makes me feel philosophical about hair. After yesterday's self hair-cutting debacle, I decided to go to the proper hairdressers to get things sorted out. I had always intended going this week in fact, which makes my self mutilation of yesterday all the more stupid.
But as before I found myself sitting in the chair as the hairdresser snipped away considering the unnatural practice of hair-groomage and wondering how we would all look if no-one ever got their hair cut (as I presume Mother Nature and perhaps God himself had intended). Cavemen are often depicted with unkempt locks and beards, but is that an accurate picture of how we'd look if we just let our hair grow? Surely not. Wouldn't an ungroomed adult human being actually have really long hair, possibly down to their feet and beards and moustaches to rival those crazy idiots in the Guinness Book of Records (remember that guy who had to unwrap his moustache to have it measured?). Did cavemen just have to hope that they got their locks trapped in the cave door or under a boulder? Or did they hack away with flint at their beards and pony tails? And who decided it was going to be a good idea to shave in the first place? Or get hair cut to above shoulder length? I know the Greeks and Romans perhaps saw it as a civilising move, but if we were just human monkeys in the trees, how would we look?
My hair cut was complete and the hairdresser leant forward conspiratorily and said, "Can I just give you one piece of advice, brother? It'll look a lot better if you grow your sideburns longer."
"Oh, I usually do," I quickly replied, "I just had a bit of an accident yesterday."
If I'd been him I would have been curious to know what kind of accident could have deprived me of my sideburns, but he just said "Oh, OK" and moved on. I guess when you are a hairdresser you have seen it all.
For the moment, at times, without the sideburns my hair slightly resembles some kind of mutated mullet. Which isn't a nice feeling. God speed the growth of my hair.Do not choose this moment to make the sides of my face go bald.
