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Out on a long, muddy walk this morning, I suddenly sensed moisture in my wellington boot and it didn't take long to find the problem - the rubber above my toes had split open. In many ways it was remarkable that I'd got forty minutes into the walk before it became an issue.
These boots had been with me for a while, to be fair, as they were the pair I was given when I appeared on The Other Boat Race in 2004. Though to be even fairer I hadn't had much call to use them when I'd been living in London. But still they were now no use to be as wellingtons. And I mourned their passing. Any repair would only be temporary and I can't be getting wet feet every morning, so both boots went in the bin. I briefly considered keeping the non-split one (the right boot) in case in my next pair of boots the right boot perished first and I could make a new chimera of a pair (I do have another pair of wellies, but they are a different colour - was I that committed to saving the environment that I'd wear one green and one black boot?). Was it worth storing a single boot on the off chance of the correct boot becoming unusable in about ten years time.
I decided these brothers should be buried together. Imagine the years of waiting and being forgotten in my garage. And eventually being thrown away by one of my grown up children when I am dead, just leaving them to wonder why I had kept one wellington boot. No. It is better these two go in the bin together and hope that they will be buried touching each other in the same landfill, where presumably they will take a couple of millennia to degrade.
My boots shalt outlive me.
If I was Bing I would have made the broken boot into a plant pot. But I am not Bing. I am Richard Herring. If you've been reading this blog all this time thinking I was Bing then you have made a BIG mistake.
Even though those wellies only got a bit of use in 2004 and then loads of use since 2017, I will still miss them. They represent another world and a different me with the same sized feet.
RHLSTP with the lovely and multi-talented Jenny Eclair is now up
