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I had been a bit worried about spending the day in a hotel room rolling around with my wife’s best friend (who is also a friend and colleague of mine), but some bloody writer had written a sketch that meant this had to happen so who am I to stop it? I mean, yes, I am the writer too, but we very much have a Me1 vs Me2 relationship with each other and so he couldn’t be stopped.
As it turned out there was nothing to fear. We managed to capture another of my perverse and cock-obsessed visions without being sleazy, thanks to more fantastic work from Ben Mallaby and his team. It was strange checking into a hotel room, booked from 10am-5pm with loads of camera equipment, but if they staff thought we were filming a porno (and had they burst into the room they wouldn’t have been dissuaded from that assumption), they didn’t say anything or judge us. I guess when you work in a hotel you know that at any one time about ten despicable acts are occurring. And a porno would probably be the eighth worst of those.
It was blisteringly hot and we had to turn the air conditioning off, but it was a steamy scene anyway, so I am sure that my perspiration only adds to the effect. There was no awkwardness with rolling around a bit with my former Fubar colleague, and we were enacting a loveless and squalid incident, which suited us fine. I love Lou very dearly though. She’s unpredictable and very funny. But it turns out she’s a really great actor too and completely stole the show. Which is how it was meant to be in this sketch. The director only realising, once we’d done it a couple of times, that I had given her most of the funny lines. Her character is a little bit mean, but she navigated the dangers of that to make her likeable and human too. I love writing for women (unlike nearly every other male writer in the world) because I love women (unlike nearly every other male writer in the world) and this sketch based on at true story (which will be familiar to those of you have been following me for a while) comes from a place where I said something stupid, that maybe didn’t deserve to be punished, but which at least excuses the punishment.
We had to cope with the lights arriving late, but again the young crew were unflappable and we did what we had to do in the time available and I am very excited about seeing how all this turns out. What an opportunity you have all given me. I hope it can all be as fun and joyous as the first couple of days of filming and that that joy translates to the audience too.
We didn’t get time for lunch, but amazingly my protein packed breakfast of steak and eggs got me through til 5pm and even though my work was largely bed based I only felt like I’d like to lie down and snooze once.
We have a long way to go and I think not enough money to quite get it done. But you can help (if you haven’t already) by buying a ticket to one (or more) of the live shows.
I am determined to reward the faith that has been put into me by the kickstarter backers. It may be all we ever do with the format, but we will go down fighting. Or go up fighting. There will be lots of fighting. That's all I know.
