I am fed up with all the jokes you hear at the expense of the stupid. Stupid people are born stupid and it's not their fault and yet every day they have to put up with a barrage of supposedly amusing comments mocking them for their stupidity. Tragically some of these people are so stupid they don't even realise that these jokes are targetted at them. Of course this makes the cruel detractors of the stupid laugh all the more. It's a vicious cycle and it's ugly and unfair and it has to be stopped.
Stupidity isn't funny. It is an affliction which some experts estimate occasionally affects up to 99% of the human race (in fact, according to these experts, only they themselves have never suffered from it) with around 60% of the population being permanantly blighted by what is classified as either hopeless stupidity or (an offensive term for many of the stupid) complete thickness. Ironically many stupid people join in with the offensive jokes against stupidity, not realising they are actually mocking themselves. They don't understand what harm they are doing to the cause of stupid people everywhere. How could they? They are stupid. Such is their curse.
Many of these stupid people are in denial often rating themselves "not at all stupid" and occasionally even "intelligent". This comes mainly through fear of the stigma that now comes with being stupid -hence many stupid people's attempts to try and deflect attention from their own stupidity by wearing "I'm with Stupid" T-shirts. They are too stupid to realise that only a stupid person would wear such an item.
We have to get rid of this shame and people should embrace their stupidness (as the stupid invariably call it) and so I am selling a range of alternative T-shirts that affirm stupidity, such as "I'm glad that I'm stupid", "Delighted to be a fuck-up", "My strongly held opinions are all clearly wrong, but is that any reason to mock me? I stongly opine that it is not" and of course "I'm with Stupid" with an arrow pointing upwards.
So next time you see Rory Bremners satirising George W Bush for his stupidity, shout at him, "Would you satirise someone because of their race or sexuality or gender, Rory Bremners?"
And when Rory Bremners says, "No, I wouldn't. Of course not. That would be wrong," then you say, "Well why are you satirising someone for being stupid. It's the same thing. And if you don't understand that then you are stupid.... which obviously is a good thing. So carry on."
That's the problem with being stupid. It's very hard to win any kind of argument or make your point effectively. But I still think we should try. And if anyone wants to mock us for our stupidity, well... we probably won't get it, unless they really dumb their comment down.
If you are stupid and would like to join my campaign to stop all jokes about the stupid and stupidity, then please write to me (or get a friend to do it if necessary) at the address on the contacts page, enclosing a cheque for £500 made payable to CASH (Cease All Stupid Humour). Please mark your envelope, "I am really stupid. Really, really fucking stupid"
