I spent the day at
Blenheim Palace, built to commemorate the
victory of the First Duke of Malborough at the Battle of Blenheim, which despite my 2:1 in History from Oxford University, I had no knowledge of whatsoever. Apparently it was important. Never heard of it.
Winston Churchill was also born in the Palace and proposed to his darling Clementine in the gardens. I have heard of him.
I had been to the grounds at least once before in the early 90s, but can't remember anything about it. All I remember is that my then girlfriend and I had a picnic and I think it was the first time I ever ate Boursin cheese. Probably not quite as historic as the Battle of Blenheim or the birth of Churchill, but I hoped there might be a small acknowledgment somewhere.
There's a lot to do at the Palace and I enjoyed myself, despite feeling slightly sickened that one family could be this wealthy and own this much land. I loved giving £16 to the millionaires who own this place. Though at least they'd been given the palace cos one of their ancestors had done something important (apparently).
My favourite bit is "The Column of Victory", a massive monument to the Battle of Blenheim in the grounds, which, if you think about it, was put there just to be appreciated by the Malboroughs originally and is equivalent of me building a massive monument to myself in my back garden.
You can also see Winston Churchill's slippers, monogrammed with his initials, again more to show off, I imagine, than to remind him that they belonged to him. It's a bit less showy than a monument though. Plus it's quite exciting to see some footwear worn by the cigar chomping Greatest Ever Briton. You can also see his boyish curls that were cut off when he was 5 and some of his watercolours, which are much better than the rubbish stuff that Hitler did. Churchill 2 Hitler 0.
The Palace has also installed an anamatronic experience called
The Untold Story, with interactive screens and dummies and pumped in smells - which is just the kind of thing I love in an attraction - though it smacks of desperation to engage with a younger generation in a place which is so stunning and amazing without it. But I enjoyed it and it puts the dummies of the
Tales of Robin Hood to shame. It made me feel I had left behind my humdrum life, when I was in a room with a very life-like bare woman, in bed, her eyes darting and her chest heaving as she worried about King Charles coming in and finding her with her lover who is hiding in the cupboard. Pretty sexy stuff! Though it would have been improved by an actor actually bursting in as the King. Or maybe if the woman in the bed wasn't quite so effectively covered up. Or if they gave you three minutes in there on your own with her as part of the entrance price. Well, if they're that desperate for our custom.
I had a really enjoyable day and there was plenty left to do that I didn't manage to get to. It's no Deddington, but it's worth a look!
