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Listened to a really good
ep of Drunk Women Solving Crime with Richard Osman on my dog walk this morning. Someone has been putting rubbish in his bin, which he classified as a crime against him, which I suppose it might technically be. Can giving someone something ever truly be theft? What is being stolen is empty space. It’ll never stand up in court.
As a big fan of bins, but also who, on occasion and when necessity dictates and I am sure the bin I am stealing space in is about to be collected anyway, I found this a fascinating discussion.
I sympathise with Osman and the invasion of his personal (bin) space and in this instance, although I have a very rough idea of where he lives, I am not the guilty party. Though I do like the idea that the perpetrator might be doing a three hour round trip to dump dirty nappies in the Two Tribes host’s wheelie bin. And I would say it wasn’t me if it was me. So there’s that.
I am aware that when I have transgressed in this regard that I am doing something unspeakably bad that could sour relations with my neighbours for a life time (hence the drive to West London) and it’s not something that I would do if there was not an emergency. Or if I thought I’d get caught. And if my bins are out and there’s any room in them, my neighbours are welcome to offload their junk (the joke’s on them though, my bins are always full- that’s why I sometimes had to use theirs).
You’d think that a man who works in TV could set up a camera to catch the culprit, or some kind of alarm that would ring if the bin was opened by someone who could not match the fingerprint keypad. It’s like he wants those nappies.
Osman also shows he has quicker wits than the sharpest of stand ups, even when drunk, with his song choice for the bank heist. I almost feel guilty about his bins now.
Anyway, I recommend this excellent podcast. My wife happens to be in it too, but that’s by the by.
Don’t listen to it til you’ve listened to RHLSTP with Shaun Williamson (aka Barry from Eastenders) though.
It’s on audio here
Still 4 more chances to see
RHLSTP live in 2019 in Northampton on Friday, then Glasgow, Sheffield and Hull
